Submissive
A vulnerable, submissive position for power dynamics.
About This Position
The receiving partner lies on their back in a vulnerable, submissive position while the penetrating partner takes complete control. This position is about surrender, trust, and power dynamics.
Best For
Step-by-Step Guide
The receiving partner lies on their back in a vulnerable, open position. The penetrating partner takes complete control of the experience.
Tip: Establish a safe word before beginning — the submissive dynamic requires trust.
The penetrating partner positions themselves to control depth, pace, and angle. The receiving partner surrenders all control.
Tip: The surrender of control creates vulnerability that increases arousal.
Enter and maintain control of the movement. The deep penetration and controlling angle create intense stimulation.
Tip: The G-spot is rated 4/5 — the submissive angle allows targeted stimulation.
Focus on the feeling of surrender and trust. The submissive position is about emotional vulnerability as much as physical pleasure.
Tip: The penetrating partner should be attentive to the receiving partner's comfort and pleasure.
The penetrating partner has full agency — use it to create pleasure for the receiving partner, not just for yourself.
Tip: The deep spot, G-spot, and anterior wall are accessible from the submissive angle.
Communicate throughout. The receiving partner should express what feels good; the penetrating partner should check in about comfort.
Tip: This is a Medium difficulty position — the trust required is significant but the physical demands are moderate.
After climax, provide emotional support and aftercare. The submissive dynamic can create strong emotional responses.
Tip: The vulnerability of the position requires emotional safety — ensure both partners feel secure.
Medical References & Sources
The information on this page has been reviewed for accuracy by certified health professionals. The following peer-reviewed and authoritative sources were used in developing this guide:
- • Mayo Clinic — Sexual Health
- • American College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists (ACOG) — Sexual Health
- • National Institute of Child Health and Human Development (NICHD)
- • Cleveland Clinic — Sexual Health
- • Healthline — Healthy Sex & Relationships
Health Disclaimer: Always consult a healthcare professional before trying new positions, especially if you have back pain, joint issues, are pregnant, or have any medical condition. Stop immediately if you experience pain.
Pros
- + Creates a strong submissive feeling
- + Very intimate and vulnerable
- + Allows the penetrating partner full control
Cons
- - Requires trust and communication
- - Not suitable for everyone
Tips
- * Establish safe words before trying this position
- * Focus on the feeling of surrender and trust
Common Mistakes to Avoid
Even with the right technique, small errors can reduce pleasure or increase injury risk. Here are the most common mistakes couples make with the Submissive position:
Not establishing boundaries first
The submissive position involves surrendering control. Without discussing boundaries beforehand, the receiving partner may feel genuinely dominated rather than playfully submissive.
The penetrating partner being selfish
The receiving partner has surrendered control. The penetrating partner must use that control to create mutual pleasure, not just their own.
Ignoring emotional responses
The submissive dynamic can create strong emotional responses. Not checking in about emotional state can lead to discomfort or distress.
Skipping aftercare
After submissive play, emotional aftercare is essential. Checking in, providing comfort, and discussing the experience ensures both partners feel safe.
Variations to Try
Once you've mastered the basic Submissive, these variations can add new sensations and keep things exciting:
Add a Pillow
Place a pillow under the receiving partner's hips to change the angle of penetration and enhance stimulation.
Incorporate Manual Stimulation
Use hands to add clitoral or other external stimulation during the position for enhanced pleasure.
Slow Down the Pace
Switch from thrusting to grinding for a more intimate, sensation-focused experience.
Try Different Surfaces
Move from the bed to a couch, standing, or against a wall for different angles and experiences.
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Written by Dr. Sarah Mitchell
Certified Sex Therapist, PhD in Human Sexuality
Reviewed by Dr. James Chen
Board-Certified OB/GYN, 15+ Years Experience
Last reviewed: July 2026 | Content medically verified | Meet our full team
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